Link to Queensland Police Service
Transcript
Bryan McCartney
You’re listening to Ushering Death. Follow us on all good podcast apps or at usheringdeath.com.au. Today on Ushering Death, I’m joined by Senior Constable Leah from the Queensland Police Service. Hi, Leah.
Senior Constable Leah
Morning.
Bryan McCartney
How you doing?
Senior Constable Leah
I’m doing really well. And you sound good. Welcome.
Bryan McCartney
Welcome to mastering death. Thanks for being with us today. You’re coming? Yeah, my pleasure, you’re coming to share a bit of a unique perspective on death with us, I guess from the perspective of a police officer. But before we start learning a bit about that, tell us tell us a bit about you. Who is Leah?
Senior Constable Leah
Who is Leah? While she is a? I’m now a 50 year old female? who’s been in the QPS for 14 years? Oh, wow. 14 days, that’s me in a compressed nutshell.
Bryan McCartney
You weren’t always obviously a police officer. So what did you do before joining the QPS?
Senior Constable Leah
Yeah, before I was a police officer, I mean, you know, my lovely, lovely daughter, and, and I had her at a very young age. So in the early parts of parts of my life, my focus was on being being that mother to her. And, you know, my progression into into becoming a police officer, I, I remember actually thinking about it, when I was probably about the age of 24. And, you know, at that time, my daughter was still fairly young. And, you know, I had family commitments and, and I remember recently being asked at a community event, you know, how I’ve progressed to becoming to becoming a police officer. And, you know, at that age, I said to you at that age of 24, I remember, I remember the house I was living in, and I was sitting in the lounge, and I was thinking to myself, you know, where do I want to take my professional career, and I think it’s, you know, really important for an individual to, you know, where possible, you know, seek out that career that’s going to, you know, promote who you are. So, I then, of course, you know, evolved to asking that question of myself, like, you know, who am I and I’ve always enjoyed helping people, you know, and, you know, as you know, later on in my life, I became a private investigator. And, and that came from, you know, that, that need to always do the right thing, you know, that justice, that that that law component, but, you know, that didn’t really give me the, also the aspect that I like, to help people. So, I considered, well, you know, who, who or what is a police officer and what’s what’s needed to be won. And, you know, I thought about, well, you’ve got to have compassion, you got to have compassion towards, you know, victims and offenders, you know, compassion on both sides of the fence. And, of course, you’ve got to have that emotional and, and you know, that that physical strength as well, and then that resilience to be able to, to recover quickly from incidents that you’ve been involved in. And, you know, at that time, at the age of 25, you know, have a young daughter, family commitments, I knew that it wasn’t something that I could pursue it, and then, you know, so, you know, as I mentioned, she’ll you know, as you know, I was a private investigator, and I went and did my endorser and role nursing, sort of sort of looking for those things that that, you know, filled those needs, and me, you know, the need to be a helper or a carer. And, and also, you know, the need to have justice. Yeah.
Bryan McCartney
I think Justice is such an important thing for us, right. You know, like, as people we want things to do the, we want people to do the right things. We want people to, we want to think that people will have our best intentions and we want to know that if something goes wrong, that justice will prevail, but that’s not always the case is it?
Senior Constable Leah
It’s, unfortunately not always the case. But you know, I always, you know, have said going through through this career that you know, only have to win that that once Yeah, I only have to have that success in that one, one occasion and then, you know, I look or I wait for that next one. And then and then they is my one. And there’s my next one. Yeah. You know, because like I said, you can’t, you can’t always win every time or you unfortunately, there isn’t justice all the time. But if we hang on to the ones that we do get.
Bryan McCartney
Yeah. And I think that’s the thing that, you know, while we think that justice should prevail every time, it probably actually shouldn’t, you know, if we look at the balance of the law of the universe in the world, and all of those things, I think, if everything was just and right, then we’d probably we’d be a really different society, I guess, it’s just started pelting down with rain here. So our listeners will probably be able to hear that in the background, but that’s all right, right, like police officers rain, hail or shine, we keep doing what we do, I guess.
Senior Constable Leah
And that’s it. That’s it.
Bryan McCartney
So you start your journey, I guess, in that law enforcement, or in that investigative space as a private investigator, and then you sort of come around to that 36 session, sort of I imagine before then, you decide that you want to be a police officer, what does that journey look like for you?
Senior Constable Leah
Well, you know, going back to, to, you know, still making, you know, that decision or that that process to becoming a police officer, you know, when my family life, you know, changed for me on that on that the, you know, the good prime old age of 40 at that point, you know, and I thought to myself, well, MI, Mo to our old, you know, but then I realised what I brought to the table and, and, you know, I thought about my insides, you know, and what I mean by that is, what my values are the service and my value to the community was was my life experiences, you know, and that’s what made me who I am. And that’s what I could offer to the service and, you know, the experiences that I derived from life, and that’s what shaped me, and I knew that’s what’s what was going to support me in being a police officer. So I think that that’s, you know, really important your or my life experiences as is, you know, what I brought to the table, and you know, these were these were my assets. So, yes, I mean, I joined, I was lucky enough to get into the academy and 2008. And having spent the then, you know, it was, it was seven months, seven months of training. And, you know, early the next year, after putting my hand up to be the recruit that sung the national anthem.
Senior Constable Leah
I marched out on out, you know, off the graduation, you know, as a sworn police officer, and, you know, it was it was one of the proudest moments of
Bryan McCartney
my life, it’s gonna say, that must be a moment that just fills you with pride. Right at that point is you’re in that uniform, your family and friends there at that stage as well.
Senior Constable Leah
Oh, yes, of course, you know, course, my family and friends were there. And I was fortunate enough. So at the graduation, when when you are presented with your badge, you do have the opportunity to invite a commissioned officer to be that person to present you with the badge. And I had a lifelong friend who was an inspector at the time. So you know, not only did I have family and family and friends, looking down upon me from You know, their seats, I also had a daring friend, Henry, my, my badge, so it was extra, extra special.
Bryan McCartney
So you march out effectively you become a police officer. And I imagine for the next little while, it’s pretty, pretty business as usual. As you’re learning on the job and you sort of encounter a few things. What does that journey look like in your first 12 months as a police officer? What does that sort of entail usually?
Senior Constable Leah
Well, God, you know, you can’t you come out as a first year constable and you have you have certain competencies that you have to pass and that 12 months, and you’re also given a mentor. And I remember my very first day, I’m out on the road and I’m sitting in the passenger seats on the one that’s responsible for the radio. And I had to let communications No, we were at at this given point in time and said to them that I was so fresh in our drive, and let’s let’s just say I’m I’ve mispronounced that. And, you know, my mentor looked across to me and said, well, Leah, no one’s going to know that you’re a newbie. So it’s, you just get learning so, so quickly on the road, and there’s so many different experiences that you can encounter with a with a shift that, you know, you’re just you’re just constantly learning and evolving into, you know, being being a police officer. Yeah.
Bryan McCartney
And I think, you know, as a police officer, I guess one of the things that you would have encountered in that, that first 12 months, or maybe not maybe a bit later, was the first time of experiencing death on the job. Does does that stick in your mind for you that first time?
Senior Constable Leah
Look, you know, as I said to you before, I’ve been in, you know, a serving police officer for 14 years and, and, you know, during that time, I have seen or participated in, you know, a lot of moments of, of, of death, you know, from suicide to natural causes, you know, drug overdoses. And I can, I can pretty much remember each one that I attended. And, you know, I’m not, I’m not talking about, you know, attended, you know, all the ones that I can count on, on one hand, I’ve been to numerous loss of life. incidents, yes.
Bryan McCartney
I think that’s one of the thing people don’t realise as well, is that our police force, regularly faced with death on the job, and that, that has to be taxing on you emotionally? How do you sort of how do you process that?
Senior Constable Leah
Look, for me, it’s, you know, I evolved through that, that that coping strategy, and I have to be honest, you know, in the, in the beginning, I probably didn’t cope very well. But as you, you know, go through your career and, and the QPS has, has offered, you know, a number of training and seminars, and I remember attending this one, and it was presented by Kevin Gilmartin. And he is a ex American police officer. And he’s a, has also specialised in behavioural and behavioural field. And during that, it’s called sorry, it’s called the emotional survival for law enforcement officer. And he speaks of this, this hyper vigilance of police officers. And he says that, you know, every day we’re in this, this heightened level of response, you know, and if you can, like picture a graph, so he drew this, this horizontal, straight line from the y axis, and then this sort of represented normality, so to speak, and then from the origin drew a line, which arched above the first and this was to represent place and our home state. And, you know, he talked about how when we’re not at work, that there wasn’t enough rest time, sort of bring us back to that normal line, you know, and, over time, you know, we can fall into this, you know, the state of detachment, you know, from loved ones, you know, you reduce your socialising, you can’t get to the gym, because your shift work, you know, you gain weight, you lose contact with people. And that sort of really rang true for me, you know, and I knew that I had to turn turn that around, you know, I had to take back my life, so to speak. So, you know, went back to the gym made sure, you know, I caught up with friends and, you know, just tried to be more active, you know, more engaging, and it speaks of this sort of emotional, being an emotional survivor. And I thought to myself, what does that mean to me, and what it meant to me was being present, being present to my environment. Ah, so when I’m at home, I need to be a partner. You know, when I’m around my family, they be that mother or, you know, a friend to a friend, you know. So that’s what I always try to come back to is just being in that in that thing in that moment, being who I need to be in The Now. And my partner, he often refers to me as being Clark Kent. I come home, I don’t have my cape on, you know, and I’m his his partner, and that’s what I owe to him. Yeah. Yeah, being at home and being a police officer isn’t is not? You know, it’s not what I owe him.
Bryan McCartney
Yes, yeah. That’s yeah, that’s a really great way to look at it. Because you know, that whole, I guess, as a police officer, you have to have that immediate preparedness of being able to respond. So I can see why that elevated level of responsiveness would absolutely cause some definite challenges for police officers, especially to switch that off. And that’s, that’s a tough thing to expect people to do. Because we integrate so much of our lives into what we do at work and what we do at home, and it becomes one. So that’s, that’s an incredibly great piece of advice. So police officers obviously encountered death in a whole range of different ways. So they obviously natural causes of death and, you know, suspicious, so what does death as a police officer actually look like for you on an average shift?
Senior Constable Leah
Well, you know, obviously, when we first get to an incident, you know, there is a obligation to investigate, isn’t there? Yeah. But I also, you know, I also believe that in parallel with that, we need to show compassion and understanding to those that have suffered that loss, and also, privacy and dignity, when you have the incident happens to, you know, happen in a public place, then, you know, showing that that dignity to the person that has lost their life, or showing the respect to the members of the public, or the neighbours, whatever the case may be in, and, of course, you know, compassion towards towards the family, and there’s that fine balance of of, you know, serving the community and investigating the matter, as well, as, you know, showing kindness to, to those who that have been affected by it. Yeah.
Bryan McCartney
So when, like, it’s, like, say it’s a natural death that you would attend? What what sort of role did police play in that situation?
Senior Constable Leah
Well, if we’ve been called to attend a natural death, then there is an element for or an or a need for police to investigate that. And that’s where, you know, I come back again, you know, showing that, you know, undertaking that investigative role to ensure that, that, you know, the outcome is as true as as as a as it stands, and then still showing that compassion and respect and understanding to to those that have been affected by it.
Bryan McCartney
Okay. And then when if a death is then sort of determined to be suspicious. So that’s a whole different process, I imagine. So what sort of happens from that perspective?
Senior Constable Leah
Look, although, of course, we are given certain details when when we’re assigned, you know, a sudden death, you still have to go in there and ensure that the information that you’ve been given is, is, you know, as it stands, that that it is, it is true. So you’re still going in investigating, and you’re still going and showing that, you know, compassion and kindness. So it doesn’t, it doesn’t change, you know, your initial response doesn’t change, it just evolves as more information is provided to you. And, you know, your investigation process may change well, for what not may it does change for suspicious passing. But, you know, how you interact with the family or those that have been affected? Does just not change? Yeah.
Bryan McCartney
So when police are faced with grey If and I guess there’s grief in a whole different range of forms and a whole different, you know, confrontations and those sorts of things. How do you deal with that? How do you deal with the grief on the job when you’re, you’re faced with that?
Senior Constable Leah
Personally, so So how, how am I dealing with the way that I can potentially react to it or?
Bryan McCartney
Well, from both perspectives? So first and foremost, how do you deal with it? And secondly, is there obviously, as a Senior Constable, I imagine you would have other constables that, you know, work with you that might need support? And that sort of stuff? How do you then support your colleagues in that that moment?
Senior Constable Leah
I always come back to that, I need to be, you know, in that moment, I need to be I need to be present, I need to be, you know, aware of who it is that that I’m encountering, and who it is that I’m supporting. And, you know, as you mentioned, co workers, you know, co workers to consider as well, you can imagine, you know, I’m a senior Senior Constable taking along an officer who was in the first year, I have an onus to to support and care for them as much as I do. The family member that has lost somebody, my, there’s no priorities, you know, and this is where I think, you know, when you when I reflect on what Mr. Gorman said in his seminar, you know, we just have so many responsibilities and not one, in its entirety, really takes precedence over another. So you’re running all these responsibilities and, and a parallel? Yeah. You know, and, and the only way that I’m successful in doing that as being present. And, you know, the being in the moment, bing, bing bing in the now. Yeah, that’s the way that I believe, you know, it can be achieved.
Bryan McCartney
Has there been a moment, I guess, in your career, when you’ve been faced with a death in the workplace or, you know, death of somebody that the grief has really lingered with you?
Senior Constable Leah
Yes, that there has been, you know, as I said to you before, I’ve been to many loss of life, incidents, and then one, there is one in particular that comes to mind. And it’s an incident that happened, you know, some years ago, and still to this day, I’m not able to talk about it in detail. And it’s, and it’s not because I haven’t compartmentalised it, it’s because I don’t need to relive it. Yeah, of course, you know, and I accept that it was a, you know, a tragic event and, and a sad loss of life. And I remember going when we were at the Academy, the facilitator said to us, there will be that one incident in your career, or hopefully just the one incident in your career where you will make an association where you have an attachment or an overreaction to it. And, for me, this was this was my one. And, you know, I don’t want to talk about, you know, any particular details, and that’s, you know, in respect to the family, because it was a horrific, sad loss of life. But I remember, we had to attend Cotu. And family member had been discovered, deceased, and there was no signs of, of any trauma. And the scene we were confronted with was, you know, one family member was so distraught while while another was, you know, very withdrawn and you saw the deceased person and, you know, there was just, it just looked like they were sleeping, you know, there was there was no evidence of any disturbance, no injuries, no property damage. And, you know, at that moment, you’re having to secure the scene because you don’t know what’s happened. And also as well as consoling the two family members taking into consideration where they were emotionally at as well as their ages. And I was at the scene for the majority of that shift and the fall When die and all watched the deceased person being taken away, I saw the family members leaving, you know, the house and this overwhelming grief that they were experiencing. And, you know, I had to make sure that media was, you know, kept at a distance, I watched people bring flowers and gifts, and leave them at the door. And another family member who had had left, prior to the discovery was later charged with homicide, oh, my gosh. And, you know, although I was only involved in this incident for two days, it was, it was emotionally exhausting. You know, it was it was, I was physically spent, you know, it was just this hole of body response that I felt, and it was just overwhelming for me, you know, because I did struggle with how the person had lost their life. You know, and, and, and the grief that I saw on the surviving family members, you know, it was, it was very, it was very overwhelming. And I remember being back at the station, and I had seen something that was associated to this incident, and I just had this overt reaction to it. And I walked out to the car park, and I didn’t know what I was going to do, I couldn’t process any, any reasonable thoughts, you know, and, and I looked around, and I had a peer support officer walking towards me, and these are officers that work with you that they’re just they’re trained to identify when other officers, you know, are in need. And they offer that their help and ongoing supportive if that’s needed in any way, he’s, he’s walking towards me, and he just, he just came up and just gave me a big hug. Yeah. You know, when we, when we, and we talked and, and I knew then that I had to go to this person’s funeral that I owed this person, the respect, you know, that they had lost their life prematurely. And, you know, my peer support officer came with me. And, you know, I still have this person’s funeral programme, my former hat.
Bryan McCartney
Yeah. When you’re in those moments, where obviously in that situation, that’s overwhelming, and that’s, that’s challenging? How do you sort of keep it together? How do you maintain your composure?
Senior Constable Leah
Oh, look, you know, when when you when you know, that you’re gonna have an, you know, a visual reaction to it. But it’s, you know, at the end of the day is as a police officer in that moment, it’s, you know, that it’s not appropriate. Yeah. And, and, you know, you’ve got to, you’ve got to be there for, you know, be there for the family, and they can’t, you know, look at somebody for support, who’s, who hasn’t got it together, so to speak, you know, so it’s this, it’s a lot of deep breaths, it’s, it’s a lot of, you know, rapid eye blinking, you know, you know, domain sharing the responsibility with your work partner. Yeah. It’s, you know, there is a need for you to, to, you know, to push that aside, for me anyway, for me, I need to push that aside, and I just keep pulling myself back to, I need to be present, this is my role, and the now this is what I need to do. And, and, and the now, you know, and, sorry, I was gonna say one time, one time, I remember, we had to go and deliver a death message. And, you know, that obviously needs to be done, you know, and in person. And we had provided the family member with the information because it was an unexpected death, it was a motor vehicle accident. And we were asked to stay and because another family member was due to come home soon, and we were asked to say, and support that person and telling the other family member. Yeah. And this person, though, just experiencing so much grief that they weren’t, that they weren’t able to, and the other person was, you know, had this the world and that this and, you know, which evolved to then being angry and, you know, tell me what’s going on and then I had to step in, you know, and so in the space of 30 minutes, I’ve delivered to death messages. Yeah. You know, and on that occasion, my partner and I weren’t the investigating unit. So we sort of had that, that, you know, reprieve after we left and had that time to check in with one another and take that time to collect ourselves. And, you know, recently a senior officer said to me, you know, Leah, and maybe you may only get a moment, because sometimes we’re rushing to the next job, and then you’ve got to be present for that, one, he can’t bring the previous job with you, you’ve got to be able to, you know, put it into that filing cabinet. And, and, you know, pull it out later, when you have the time. And the senior officer said to me, there may only be a moment there, but you have to stop and plant your feet and ground yourself. Yeah. Greg, just just enough to be able to get yourself to the end of the shift. Yeah, you know,
Bryan McCartney
and, you know, because you’re, we’re talking about people’s emotions as well, you know, like, that must be so tough for police officers to just be able to do that, because you’re right, you might have to go from something that, you know, quite simple, you know, pulling someone over a traffic stop to something seen, you know, considerably more intense to then, you know, another thing like, yeah, I imagine what you guys sort of see and do on a daily basis is, is pretty diverse. And that, that takes a lot of control, I imagine of yourself and your own emotions to be able to handle and cope with that. I imagined,
Senior Constable Leah
you know, the community has an expectation of us, don’t they? And, you know, we’re not only enforcers, but we’re helpers as well. And when somebody needs our help, they, they don’t come to us with expectations that that of where we’ve just been. And they don’t, you know, deserve to be treated, you know, differently as as, as a result of that they have expectations. And that’s where I come back to being present all the time. You know, there’s that need for me to, to be there for the person in their moment of need, whatever that may be. Yeah.
Bryan McCartney
And, you know, I guess, interesting point about the expectations of the community, do you think sometimes people’s expectations of police, police officers is is more than it should be?
Senior Constable Leah
I don’t know whether I can answer that one. Okay.
Bryan McCartney
Like, I think we, you know, we expect police officers to be infallible and to be stoic, and, you know, be be there for when we need them. I wonder whether as a community, do we provide that same level of reciprocal support to our police force that, you know, we expect of them? But anyway, I digress. Sorry.
Senior Constable Leah
Guess you’re right, though, there is this, this, you know, feeling woman mentality that, that we you know, that we are infallible, that we’re, you know, that we, we do have the answer to everything. And, although, obviously, our aim is to, to satisfy the needs of the community. There are times when we can’t do it in the now but, you know, I think that, you know, with the, you know, with what we have to outsource to all the resources that we have available to us, I like to think that that eventually, we are able to help everybody to the level that that they need. Yeah, even if, let’s say, I can’t help you right now. But yeah, I will help you.
Bryan McCartney
Yeah. And the police, you know, the police force and the police service, they, they don’t just like what doesn’t just stop when the job is finished. Right. So, you know, for you guys, I imagine there’s a whole range of things that happen after that, and there’s follow up and, you know, checking back in with people and that sort of thing. How to sort of you, you make sure that you, I guess again, uh, keeping yourself well, from an emotional perspective, when, you know, I imagine you guys are busy constantly, like, how do you sort of, you know, really process and keep yourself mentally? Well?
Senior Constable Leah
And that’s a really good question. And again, it’s for me, it’s something that has evolved, you know, during during my career. I’m gonna admit, I don’t think I was great at it at the beginning. I’ve definitely improved, you know, my response to that and gotten a lot a lot better. And what I make a concerted effort to do at the end of end of shift coming home is that I self reflect. And I think to myself, Where are Am I where am I at now? Am I Am I now and partner mother mode? Has my day gone the way that I expected? Did I react the way that was appropriate? Is there anything that I need to to address? And the one benchmark that I always use? I don’t know whether you’ve heard of it, I call it the rear vision mirror test. Okay. Yep. Okay. Okay. So stay with me. So if I hop into the driver’s seat, and I’ve got to lower the rear vision mirror that my posture is slumped.
Bryan McCartney
Right? Okay. Yep. Those physical signs, you’re looking for carrying too much weight? Yes, gotcha.
Senior Constable Leah
What? And then why? And as you know, is that something that I can deal with in the 20 3040 minutes that’s going to take me to go home? Or do I need to, you know, put it in my pending folder and deal with it at a later time. Because by the time I get out of the car, once I get home, or to my destination, I am then I then need to be that other role. And, you know, sometimes, sometimes that means taking the long way home. Sometimes that means making a disclaimer as soon as I get out of the car. Today has not been a great day. Yeah. Yeah, I may seem a little withdrawn, but I’m okay. And I think that’s important to tell, you know, the one your loved ones, that you may not be okay. That you, you know, you may have had a very challenging time at time at work, but also letting letting them know that you will be okay. Yeah, I just need some time out today. But I’m going to be okay.
Bryan McCartney
I think it would be really hard to understand not only understand, but appreciate what you potentially would have experienced on your shift, especially for a family member or for a loved one. I know even as funeral directors going home to talk to her family sometimes. And they sort of give you that look of like what, like, that’s not not a thing, like what are you talking about? But, you know, for us, it’s a reality. It’s an everyday thing. So, yeah, I think it’s a great bit of advice, just to say, hey, you just need a hot minute, just give me a second to process and then I’ll be right back with you. Which is a good thing.
Senior Constable Leah
Because then, you know, by why not? You know, keeping them informed and letting them know, you know, how you’re travelling. That what the thing that’s the mind wander doesn’t have the other person and they’re wondering, now what, what, what on earth is going on here? And what have I done to only get one word answers, as opposed to I now know why I’m getting one word answers. And I know it’s not going to be for the long term.
Bryan McCartney
Yeah. How has being a member of the Queensland Police Service changed your view on life and death and grief?
Senior Constable Leah
Look, I think about what what being a police officer, you know, has taught me and, you know, having gone through some significant events, but been fortunate enough, you know, the QPS has some wonderful support services for their employees. So, you know, having gone through those, those seminars, and that training, you know, has provided me as well as being able to self reflect and that that’s something that I have, it didn’t come easy, you know, it wasn’t second nature. For me, I had to make a concerted effort to self reflect all the time to now that it’s easy for me to do deal with or to do Sorry. Now, I know that when it comes to to death and grief, I, I know that I have the ability to be able to support people and support them with confidence. And also know that I’m going to be able to support myself with confidence. And if at the end of the day because I always say to people, it’s okay, not being okay. It’s okay to be sad, you know, it’s when when those feelings linger that that’s, you know, when it’s not okay, yeah, and I know when I get to those moments, then I I reached out for support. And and, you know, the QPS has an early intervention treatment programme. You know, they will pay for, you know, a number of consultations with psychologists or psychiatrists. And, and I’ve used that service a couple of times in my career. Because like I said before, I’m Okay, with not being okay. Yeah, yeah. And and if I can’t get myself through that phase on my own, then I don’t hesitate and reaching out.
Bryan McCartney
Yeah, that’s brilliant. What?
Senior Constable Leah
Sorry, I didn’t actually answer your question, but I don’t think, you know, frankly, I don’t my view hasn’t changed on on death or grief. You know, I think it’s one of the most saddest things and you know, the most emotional feelings that that a person can go through. You know, but but when it comes to life, I think, well, you know, I think about what is it Mark Twain’s saying, you know, dance, like, no one’s watching. Live, like, it’s heaven on it, you know? Because we don’t know how long we’re gonna be here for, you know, and we’ve got to appreciate who we have around us and let them know that they’re also appreciated.
Bryan McCartney
Yeah, great advice. What advice would you give to a new police officer, when they’re just starting out, and what what’s your pearls of wisdom that you would share with them this specifically around death and grief on the job?
Senior Constable Leah
I think I keep going back to it, I’m the person that if I think something’s really good, or something’s, you know, really beneficial, I’ll I will, you know, go to do it a number of times, and I went to Kevin Gilmartin seminar twice, that’s how, that’s how great I thought he was, you know, and this, you know, taking taking back your life or holding on to your life, as it existed, pre being a police officer is absolutely vital. You know, it’s an unfortunate that, you know, shift work takes can take away the ability to be able to attend social functions, or, you know, go to, you know, sporting events or things like that, and then we become very inward. And, and, to a certain extent, you can start feeling this, this anger towards your job, when you still have those things in your control, it’s a lot harder. Now, you can imagine, if you love playing soccer, and trying to find, you know, a club, that will allow you to not be available on that Wednesday, and not be available on on that Friday, and still allow you to be, you know, a part of that, that that club is really difficult. So you go too hard to do, and you throw that one away, and then just things too hard doing it, you throw, throw that away, as well, I think it’s really important to just to continue to hold on to those things, or find a way to keep those those, you know, outside of work activities, activities going.
Bryan McCartney
Great. And what about this is merely my last question, but what advice would you give to the community, so when they’re dealing with police, in those moments of grief or death and loss?
Senior Constable Leah
I don’t know whether I would give any advice to the community, you know, the, I feel in my position as as a police officer, and, you know, I want to say that, you know, everything that that I have said to this point, and anything that I say afterwards, you know, it’s all being based on my experiences, you know, and, and my beliefs and, and the way that, I think, is the most appropriate way to do things, but you know, we have an obligation to the, to the community to be for them, to be there for them when they need us. And there are going to be times that we are there and they think that they don’t need us. And so we stay because we are needed, and so we’re faced with that, that anger or that, that that shutdown or that you know, that being being rejected, so to speak, but that’s then our job to keep to continue to persevere, and break through those barriers and, and, and just be there for them. This is not personal when, when they you know, lash out emotionally and could be looking directly at me. It’s not personal. Yeah. They don’t know me. Yeah. Yeah. And and it’s not necessarily directed at my profession either. It’s just that I’m the person that’s standing in front of them. Yeah. So I don’t have I don’t expect the community to change. To me. It’s up to me to break down those barriers.
Bryan McCartney
Well, yeah, it’s been fantastic talking with you today. Thank you so much for joining us.
Senior Constable Leah
Thank you for having me.
Bryan McCartney
No worries. We’ll leave it there. Thanks, everyone. Tune in next week for Ushering Death.Don’t forget to like and subscribe. Follow us on your favourite podcast app and visit us at usheringdeath.com.au